My Dearest Family and Friends,
Goodness time flies here. I can’t believe I am already finished with the first semester of ministry. Yesterday was the last day, and this next week will be spent debriefing the past semester and then Christmas Break after that. It seems like yesterday we were rolling in here to UCSA half asleep and jetlagged. Between then and now, God has done some amazing things in my own heart that goes beyond what I could have ever learned in a textbook. The stories of what I have seen and witnessed here might be considered crazy by some, odd by others, but God has defiantly worked through me and my team-mates in amazing ways.
First off, let me explain what has been happening the past two weeks. I have started to really journal lately; “mostly because I can be such a forgetful person when it comes to what Christ is doing in my life,” so know that I am most likely going through my journal as I write.
My St. Francis team felt led to show the movie Beat The Drum to the township of St. Francis, so we had been working on putting everything together to show the movie. After going to the township Community Hall they have, we got an okay for a spot one evening to show the movie. We advertised and told people to come, and the night that we showed the movie, “December 3rd,” we only got a few people that actually came to the movie and then the power shut off in the middle of the movie. Everyone left pretty much immediately after that happened, so there was no chance to finish it that day.
We felt very discouraged over this happening, but still felt called to show the movie to everyone in the township. So the next week, we got the space again and started the movie. So many more people came to the showing the second time. I was outside praying through the whole movie so I didn’t really get to see people, but the other girls told me that the people were going, “Sho,” (which basically is the word South Africans use for when they are like… Wow, hugh, WHAT?, interesting, Really?… all combined into one……. I am sure you will hear me say it a lot when I get home if you haven’t heard me say it already on Skype) and were very into the movie. Then at the end God gave us a word for them after the movie. Basically it was a call to stand up for what is right in their community, to speak out against sexual immoral lives, to tell the truth.
We asked everyone who would make a commitment to stand up for what is right to actually stand up in the audience. Only one man stood, but I feel that I would much rather have one man that would actually do something than a whole audience that stands up, and wouldn’t do anything. At least the audience was given a lot to think about. I am sure that it made a pretty big impact on the ones who did see the movie, and I hope they would decide to do something about AID’s in their community.
Our last day of ministry was yesterday, so after the movie, this whole week has been basically saying goodbye. Florette, one of the people that we visit, asked me what I am doing next year. I told her that I might be in Kenya next year. She then asked me, “Why would you be in Kenya.”
“Well,” I said, “because God probably wants to use me to fill needs there.”
Then she said, “But we have needs! Why can’t He send you here? We need you.”
“Well, why don’t you tell God that? Maybe you could change his mind.”
Then she said chuckling, “I think I will.”
I will talk to you about the Kenya thing later on. In the mean time, it has been pretty hard saying goodbye, knowing that all these people that we have invested in will probably never see us again, and vice versa. It was hard to see them cry. I don’t think we ever realized the impact we made on these people until this week when we saw them in such sadness over us leaving. We will defiantly miss them.
One cool thing that happened was my PE, “people down here call Port Elezibeth PE a lot, so if I do, don’t think that I am talking about Physical Education… besides if you don’t know anything about me, just know that I hated Physical Education, and I don’t think I would go there for fun,” team was able to work with the Church that we will be partnering with next semester. We got to meet the youth, play with the kids, and meet the pastor. I am so excited to see how God uses us all next year with that group. One of the leaders of the youth worship band wants me to play piano and harmonize with him next semester, so it will be nice to have a piano to play after this.
Now for what has been going on in my heart… Maybe I should start with Kenya so y’all, “hehe,” know what I am talking about. Before the trip started, I got accepted into AIM and another group called International Christian Youthworks. I got to a point in June that I knew that I got accepted into both, but I wanted to pray about where God wanted me more. Then He showed me that He wanted me to go with AIM this year. Even though I have been with AIM, ICY, “International Christian Youthworks,” has still been on the back of my mind. One cool God thing that happened is that I had been thinking about them for two weeks wanting to catch up and see how they were. The same day I was going to write to them, Ruthy, “one of the girls that works in Kenya at the moment and wrote to me to tell me that I was accepted,” found me on Facebook and added me as a friend. Since then we have been writing back and forth to each other asking about our mission work and what God has been doing in our lives.
God has been giving me little messages here and there to say that He wants me in Kenya next year, but I have been trying to make sure that it is what God wants, and not what I want. I was talking on the phone with my mom at one point, and she said to me, “Andrew, I get the sense that God may want you on the mission field for more than one year.” I could go on and on and on about how many times I have thought I felt God taking me there next year, but I still want to pray about it and make sure that Kenya is where God wants me before I truly say I am going there or not. Please pray for me that God will give me clear direction if that is where He wants me next year.
I am still pretty homesick, but I have also been realizing that even though I am physically here in Jeffreys Bay, I am still mentally at home. I am such a big family person, a big friend person, a big home person that I have been feeling like I am missing out on a lot at home. I am not saying that I have hated it here, or that if I had it all to do over again that I would have stayed home, I just miss everyone. I feel as if I a missing out on so many events. My sister turned 16, my Aunt is pregnant, I have heard of people dying or moving away, I am missing Christmas with my family, Thanksgiving with my family, being there when people need me. I am afraid even to the point that when I get home that people will change so much that it won’t be the same when I get home. Friendships that I dearly love, even here, will fade away. I have tried to compensate and hold tightly to family and friends so much by using Skype, Facebook and email that I have really almost forgotten about the family here that God has given to me, and through this, God has been silently whispering in my ear, “Just let them go. Focus on me, I am here for you. “
A few days ago I was reading Matthew 12:46-50 where Jesus’ mother and brothers wanted to see Him and talk to Him, so they get someone to go get Jesus, but Jesus looks at the man and says, “Who is my mother and brothers?” I thought that it was silly of Him to ask that question, because He is Jesus, and He obviously knew everything. But then Jesus did something that really struck me. After asking/telling the man that, He looked at Hid disciples and said, “Here are my mother and brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brothers and sister and mother.” To Jesus, obviously family to Him was more than just His biological family, it was also the people that He was around that were doing His will. Here, everyone on my team is doing God’s will and we are all here to serve God, and be there for each other. To in essence, be a Family, to be each other’s brothers, sisters, and mothers/fathers in Christ.
I realized this and how often I have been clinging on to the people at home too much. Tag told me that I will probably find that the people at home weren’t the ones that changed, but that I had changed a lot since I was gone, which I have. I struggle so much with missing you all and wanting to be with you. Perhaps the Holidays, “and my birthday next Wednesday, the 17th,” are a lot of what’s causing the homesickness, but if I am to be a brother to anyone on this team, I know that I almost have to stop being that to the people at home, and put myself in the position of being there for everyone on the team more than for the people at home. God is taking care of you, and you are in His hands. I need to stop trying to be God and take care of people, and start mentally being where God has placed me.
To explain those three paragraphs in short, I need to start limiting my time at Office for you/the internet café and start being here more for everyone. I don’t know what that looks like yet, but I am sure God will reveal to me what He wants me to start doing.
Well… I have again written almost too much for you all. I am surprised if anyone reads my blog anymore with all these long explanations of my week. Anyways, I miss you all and I love you all. I will try to remember to write again soon.
Andrew
